|Molly Dollars Rules
||Tuesday, April 24, 2001 - (04-24-01)
Official Molly Dollars Rules
Number of players: 2 or more
Materials needed: At least ten Molly Dollars each. More Molly Dollars however are recommended, being as more Molly Dollars extends playing time.
Rules: Shuffle up your Molly Dollars. Each player sets his or her stack of Molly Dollars, which is refereed to as a "bank", in front of them. Next each players picks off the top Molly Dollar from their pile and throws it down on the table before them. The Molly Dollar with the highest serial number takes the hand. The game continues until one person's bank is broke and they run out of Molly Dollars.
Note: "Molly Dollars" is NOT a variant of the card game "War" since "War" is played with cards and "Molly Dollars" is played with "Molly Dollars".
- Winning player of hand gets to punch loosing player in the arm.
Note: Chook Industries is not responsible for any injuries caused if this rule is used.
- Play game with 50 Molly Dollars per player, each player throwing a total of 5 Molly Dollars down a hand and adding up the totals to see who takes it.
- Play Molly Dollars over NetMeeting with a friend.
Note: NetMeeting does not endorse Molly Dollars.
- Play with children under the age of 5. 5-year-old children do not process information as quickly as adults. This is an excellent chance to cheat and a good way to get lots of Molly Dollars.
- Play Molly Dollars at Pearl Jam venues or while listening to Pearl Jam. Chook Industries employees claim that this heightens the intensity of the Molly Dollars game.
Note: Pearl Jam does not endorse Ticketmaster or Molly Dollars.
- Have the looser of the Molly Dollars game order a Boxing Match on Pay Per View.
- After the hand return the Molly Dollars to the looser. The winner and looser now go out to Outback Steakhouse and show that there is no hard feelings over steak and pay for the meal with the Molly Dollars which all capitalists ventures in the American States recognize as legal tender. Now both players go out and by some new Molly Dollars and play again.
Note: Outback Steakhouse does not endorse Molly Dollars.
- Swear when you loose a hand of Molly Dollars to cause endless laughs among you and your friends.
Note: Make sure you are of 18 years of age if you are cursing while playing Molly Dollars. Chook Industries does not endorse the use of the optional swear rule if you are under the age of 18 unless you have legal consent from your guardian.
- Play bra-less Molly Dollars with 18 years of age and older women.
- Play Molly Dollars at the local bank and make people believe you and your friends are just counting money.
Ordering Information: $5.00 shipping with a $3.95 processing fee that does not include shipping or handling. Each Molly Dollar is an Authentic American One Dollar Bill. All Molly Dollars are sold as the U.S. Government has minted them. Each Molly Dollar is unique with its own individual serial number. All Molly Dollars are individually packaged in paper wrappers. To get you Molly Dollars delivered to you as quickly as possible, please email us at email@example.com with a subject of "Give Me Molly Dollars" and we will tell you how to go about placing your order today. All orders are processed with the speed and satisfaction that Chook Industries guarantees to all of its customers.
First, let me tell you that Molly Dollars is a great game. I haven't slept since my official Molly Dollars came in the mail on Monday. Needless to say I have been steady running on the fuel of coffee, Billy Joel, and pure Molly Dollar adrenaline. Anyhort (sic), I have created a slight variation of the game using what we here at Rancho de JJ call 'Molly Cards' and would like for Chook to officially endorse this alternate version of the game. It all started when me and my cousin were playing Molly Dollars at my Step-Mom's house the other day. She was pretty drunk and as a result I ended up winning all of her Molly Dollars. So what to do now, right? First we agreed that I would spot her one Molly Dollar if she would touch my pp with her finger. But then she lost again. Then later, when she went online to order more molly dollars she pulled out her credit card to pay and I realised that credit cards have numbers on them too, and although I was aware that her credit card wasn't officially endorsed by Chook Industries, we decided to try 'Molly Cards' instead (I hope this is ok!). I took out a card of my own and we compared serial numbers on the cards. I must have been on some sort of winning streak because yet again I was declared victor. I should of known that I had an edge because our 'Molly Card' numbers (though they were 'officially' VISA cards I guess because they weren't formally endorsed by Chook Industries) were:
9851 6481 2217 7455 exp. 11/03
while hers was only:
3491 5681 2247 6584 exp. 03/02
So as you can see I won hands down. So I was wondering if Chook Industries could endorse this rule variation of the greatest game in the world for me. I would really appreciate it.
Talk to you soon,
* * *
We're glad you're having so much fun with your Molly Dollars. Everybody deserves to have that much fun. It is okay about using the credit card as a Molly Dollar game variant. Chook Industries just doesn't want people using other unendorsed American currency. We'll keep your suggestion of Molly Cards in mind for the future, but for now, just be sure to keep your bank full of Molly Dollars!
Note: JJ's original letter to Chook was posted on the Chook Industries Message Board. We've made necessary grammatical corrections but have tried to leave the letter as is. Chook Industries does not endorse JJ's letter or its views and cannot held responsible for any damage that may incur to either JJ or other third parties because of his letter. Click here to read his original letter.
Read more about Molly Dollars here.
Legal Notice: Molly Dollars may only be played with Molly Dollars issued from Chook Industries. If you are caught playing with contraband Molly Dollars not purchased from Chook Industries, legal action will be taken against you.